The Kelroy Region

#1 The Abandoned Tower

Tuesday June 14th, 2011

In the Kelroy Region, north of Pinerick and South of Thurro, there is a road that runs east-west within the northern region of the Grimley Forest. Along this road lies the The Red Dragon Inn, owned operated and ran by Thomas Acquaintance (the human fighter). Thomas Acquaintance put a call out for adventurers via flyers in the town of Pinerick, and a young adventuring duo took to the call. Daedrus the Dark Elf Thief, and Glitterpuff the Dwarven Cleric (with a pen – iss) had recently met up and decided they could make some cash money together.

The duo headed to the red dragon Inn, and met Thomas Acquaintance who had a terrible opinion of them from the start (They both rolled 20’s on their checks. hahaha first rolls of the game) Thomas explained that he wanted a shield that was buried within the catacombs of a Tower to the South, The Abandoned Tower. The duo decided they’d help him. Thomas gave them keys to places to stay in the Inn for the night and said they’d head out in the morning. Daedrus looked around inside the inn and noticed that what the logs were inside of was from a very long way away, and he could deduct that Thomas Acquaintance had gotten these logs a long way away. Daedrus and Glitterpuff went looking around outside the Inn. They had a talk with a traveler, Friar Morehad, and Glitterpuff did a great job talking to the man. They had a talk about his monastary and Friar Morehad informed them that Thomas Acquantance donated food to the Monastary on occasion. The friar invited glitterpuff and her friend to stay at the monastary sometime FO FREE. after they got the information he went on his way. Gitterpuff started skipping rocks, and daedrus went running south. He came to open rolling plains after running through the forest for a bit, and he saw the tower they would most likely be going to the next day. He happened upon some healing mushrooms and picked them up. Glitterpuff met up with Daedrus, and they started walking and saw a bird in a nest. Daedrus shot at the bird and missed a couple times but persisted until he killed him. He started walking towards the tree and realized he was surrounded by three large hawks. Glitterpuff was very sad that daedrus had killed a bird. Daedrus climbed up the tree and started shooting birds down doing a pretty good job of not being hit. Glitterpuff cast animal friendship on one, and it swooped over to her and she cuddled with it, while daedrus killed another one, looked in the nest and only found 3 eggs. He threw the eggs to the ground and they exploded. Daedrus went down, and ate the yolk, and ended up throwing up the raw egg yolk. Glitterpuff was pretty much like, “thats what you get” while she cuddled with her falcon friend. This ordeal is usually referred to as the Peaceful Hawk Incident. The hawk flew off when the spell wore off, and they headed back to the Inn, drank some burrs, daedrus got smashed and started taking his shirt off on a table and dancing while thomas acquaintance just shook his head, and Glitterpuff was just chill. They went to sleep, and woke up to Thomas acquaintance telling them it was time to go. They hopped on their horses and headed to the tower. Thomas had no shirt on just a bandalier, long black hair, and a black beard. he got off his horse and took out a big two handed sword, and tried to kick down the door to no avail. Daedrus tried to pick the lock and failed. Thomas bashed down the door. The first room had nothing in it and Daedrus tried to convince Thomas to go up the stairs first, but he wouldn’t. Daedrus heard cackling as he went up the stairs, and wasn’t very quiet, so the gobbies turned around and saw him immediately, and they were playing cards on the floor. Daedrus just started talking to them, and they were wondering why the adventurers were in their room. Glitterpuff made quick friends and was soon playing sheepshead with them and she bet her tunic and gold, and lost it to them in their game. While glitterpuff had them distracted, Daedrus snuck up and performed a backstab on a gobbie not expecting it, and immediately killed him rather graphically with the dagger just popping out of the otherside of the gobbie’s chest, and blood spurting everywhere. The other gobbie started screaming, and glitterpuff took out her handaxe and shield and said “I’m so sorry!” and chopped that gobbie’s head clear off. This is often referred to as The Sheepshead Maneuver. The group claimed the chest and they saw a panel in the ceiling of the room. Glitterpuff got on Daedrus’s shoulders and opened the panel, revealing a weapons room. Glitterpuff said that the only way the weapons could be used if she showed him was for good. They got some weapons up there, grabbed what the gobbies had, and headed down the stairs. They opened the floor panel of the tower’s first floor and dropped a rope down the pit. Thomas acquaintance tried climbing down the rope, but fell and sounded like he got injured. Daedrus made it easily down, and Glitterpuff slipped and fell as well. However, thomas had fell on a spike that had come out of the ground. Glitterpuff cast cure light wounds on Thomas acquaintance and he was feeling a little better. They looked at a room that was about 20 feet wide and 30 feet long. It was smooth stone, and there was a casket in the back. Daedrus started walking towards the casket and the stone ground cracked and two skeletons came up from the ground, all angry and shit. “This is like real!” lololol. The skeletons began attacking them and thomas acquaintance took a hit right away. Daedrus sliced up a rib, and glitterpuff was unable to turn undead. A battle ensued and the casket in the back ended up opening. The main skeleton said a spell and the skeleton that had lost a rib started to grow skin back. Glitterpuff chopped the head off of one of the skeleton henchmen, and the battle continued. A superfast attack at daedrus was a giant fail for the skeleton of Sir Geoffery from the back. Thomas Acquaintance took two fireballs and a slice and he was knocked unconscious. and shit. Uhm. Daedrus and glitterpuff fought those dudes for awhile until they finally killed em’. All this lighting and stuff came out of the main guy and everything dissapated xcept a helm a sword and a shield. This battle is often referred to as The Freeing of Sir Geoffery Daedrus fed him the rest of the mushrooms (he had eaten one at one point) and stabalized thomas. They tied a rope around him, dragged him up, put him on a horse and headed back to the tavern with the booty. Daedrus tried picking locks while thomas was passed out, but to no avail. the crew went to sleep – holla atcha boi!

“I don’t have an active penis, I just have one.”

“You don’t need healing mushrooms when you have a healing mom”

“Nah man”



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